UGLY!
by Chibi Tanny
Summary: This is a perfectly NORMAL story, no wait is it a story? and why is Iggins involved?


Author's note: This song fic/story was written by GIRCHIC and THE SLAYER!  
  
Disclaimer:   
  
The Slayer: Freak show! We're gonna be normal!!  
  
GirChic: We are?!  
  
The Slayer: Yes. Can you please just TRY to be normal for once?  
  
GirChic: Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!  
  
The Slayer: That's not normal.  
  
GirChic: It was for me!  
  
The Slayer: What would be NORMAL is saying that we don't own Invader Zim, and that we don't own Daphne and Celeste's song!  
  
GirChic: Don't worry! I'm as perfectly normal as an insane danger can get!!  
  
  
UGLY!  
  
  
By The Slayer & GirChic  
  
  
It was a perfectly NORMAL day and Tan and Meg were walking along the street to Skool. The two gals walked into the Skoolyard just as the bell rang, and then they filed into the classroom along with all the other students of Ms Bitters' class.  
  
Meg sat at her usual desk beside Zim, and Tan sat beside Dib.   
  
'Hey, Tan. What are you and Meg doing for your Oral Presentation today?' Dib asked, leaning over into the aisle.  
  
'It's a secret,' Tan grinned mischievously.   
  
Suddenly Ms Bitters appeared, bringing a cold sensation throughout the room.   
'Right, class. It is now time for your Oral Presentations, and if you haven't got one, then you're just going to be DOOMED,' she hissed. 'Now who's doing their DOOMED Presentation first?'  
  
'WE WANT TO!!!!' Tan and Meg screeched together. Then they both leapt up from their seats and walked up to the front of the classroom. Tan was carrying a tape in her hand and Meg was carrying a portable stereo.  
  
Tan stood up straight and spoke. 'Okay. We need a volunteer from the audience!' She gestured towards all the miserable-looking children.  
  
Meg peered around at everyone. 'Hey, Iggins! Come here!'   
  
There was a chorus of moans and groans as the hypo kid bounced to the front.  
  
'What do I gotta do?!' he asked.  
  
'Just . . . stand there,' said Tan.  
  
'You just gotta be Iggins, ya know?' Meg explained.  
  
'Yeah. Ya just stand there and look p-p-pretty ugly!' Tan stated.  
  
'Okay! 3, 2, 1, HIT IT!!!' Meg cried. With that, Tan popped the tape in the stereo and pressed the 'Play' button and then the room filled with music. The two girls stood in front of Iggins and began to sing.  
  
'AAAAAHHHHHH!!! THE NOISE!!!' Zim yelled. 'Oh. Wait a minute - it's not that bad!'  
  
Dib watched with interest as Tan and Meg performed.  
  
TAN: I saw you walking down the street just the other day  
I didn't see your damage from that far away  
I should have got a clue when the kids started screaming   
You walked up to me with your buck teeth a gleaming  
Your hair was all frizzy and your face was a mess  
I thought it was a sack but it's your favourite dress   
You hurt the trees feelings and the birds all flew   
I don't mean to insult you   
Oh wait! Yes I do.  
  
MEG: Your teeth are yellow, they're covered in mould  
You're only ten you look a hundred years old  
When looks were handed out you were last in line   
Your face looks like where the sun don't shine   
Did you fall off a building and land on your head  
Or did a truck run over your face instead   
There ain't no pill cos you ain't ill.  
  
BOTH: *Point at Iggins* You're ugly!  
U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly!  
U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly!  
  
TAN: What you really need is to wear a mask   
And book that plastic surgeon fast - (boy)  
You're scary - you're hairy I heard about you   
You're the main attraction at the city zoo   
You're so fat and ugly with a belly full of flab   
When you wear a yellow coat people shout out cab   
(so funny)   
  
MEG: You got eyes like a pig and your nose is big   
And with hair like that you should be wearing a wig  
Uncle fester remember him? I never knew that you had a twin  
You can't disguise your googly eyes  
In the miss ugly pageant you win first prize   
Yo mama says you ugly -   
You ugly!  
  
BOTH: U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly!  
U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly  
  
MEG: Get busy, Get busy, Get busy, Get busy, Get busy, Get busy, Get busy, Get busy, Get busy.  
  
TAN: Yo mama says you're ugly   
  
MEG: Get busy  
  
TAN: Yo mama says you're ugly   
  
MEG: Get busy  
  
TAN: Yo mama says you're ugly  
  
MEG: Get busy you're ugly!   
  
TAN: U.u.u.u. Now I feel like blondie  
  
BOTH: *Point at Iggins*  
U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly!  
U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly!  
  
*The whole class is now swinging to the beat, singing, and pointing at Iggins*  
  
MEG: Quasimodo, Camel breath, Squarehead.  
  
ALL: UGLY!  
  
TAN: Chicken legs, Pig face, Chin like bubba.  
  
ALL: UGLY!  
  
MEG: Fish lips, Toad licker, Poindexter.  
  
ALL: UGLY!  
  
Tan: Spaghetti arms, Limp butt.  
  
TAN & MEG: Freak show!!  
  
ALL: UGLY!  
  
*Now as the class was in full swing, Tan leaped upon Ms Bitters desk and started to screw up last weeks maths test and throw them about the room, the majority pelting the annoyed Iggins*  
  
ALL: U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly!  
  
ALL: U.G.L.Y  
  
ZIM: you could make an onion cry!  
  
ALL: U.G.L.Y  
  
DIB: like an alien chased by the F.B.I!  
  
ALL: U.G.L.Y, U.G.L.Y, U.G.L.Y, U.G.L.Y, U.G.L.Y, U.G.L.Y.  
  
TAN & MEG: U.G.L.Y you ain't got no alibi you ugly!   
  
As the song came to it's final beat the class embraced the two girls in a loud roar of cheers.  
  
'Thank you, Thank you,' beamed Tan, taken in the glory.  
  
'Thank you, you're too kind!' giggled Meg.  
  
Tan and Meg took their places proudly.  
  
'That was the MOST DOOMYEST oral, I have ever heard,' sneered Ms Bitters and the class came to silence, 'You get an A+ + +.'  
  
'Hey! There's no such mark!!' protested Iggins enraged.  
  
'Shut your pie hole and take your seat,' snapped Ms Bitters.  
  
'But I'm insulted!' snorted Iggins crossly.  
  
'RIGHT! That's it!' Ms Bitters snarled, ' You can take all of Dib's detentions for the rest of the year.'  
  
'YES!' yelped Dib joyfully.  
  
'And as for the rest of you...,' continued the snake teacher, 'You will pass with a low miserable mark, now beat it.'  
  
With that the bell for recess sounded and all the children violently pushed and shoved their way out of the class room. Iggins was the only student left, he was planning his revenge...  
  
THE END?  
  
So what happened to the characters later on in the future?  
Well Tan & Meg went on and became famous POP stars, singing all of Daphne & Celeste's songs. When they got wind of this, they tried to sew Tan & Meg but lost because the two young girls were too RICH & POWERFUL and in actual fact, Tan & Meg sewed Daphne & Celeste for sewing them and they got 1.4 million dollars out of it.  
Zim became the ruler of McMeaties and owned the country of Australia.  
Dib went on to become a paranormal investigator and is still searching for 'BIG FOOT' who had now stolen Dib's belt-sander, who knows why.  
Gaz became president of the United States.  
Gir went on and had a family of baby Girs named: Jir, Tir, Vir, Wir and Tic?  
Ms Bitters got a job on the weakest link.  
And as for Iggins...well he is still planning his revenge and had made an appointment to see a plastic surgeon.  
  
  
  
*We see behind The Slayer and GirChic that the whole city is on fire*  
  
The Slayer: Well that was PERFECTLY NORMAL!  
  
GirChic: Yep, normal as normal can be.  
  
The Slayer: Now whether you want to be normal or just completely insane review this story and you will get your BIGGEST wish to come true!  
  
GirChic: Cause the RUBBER PIG fairy is gonna make it happen!!  
  
The Slayer: Well that's perfectly NORMAL!!  
  
GirChic: VERY NORMAL! 


End file.
